My first Mother’s day!

Yes, my first Mother’s Day as a mom! So for the first time in years I’m not fearing the day. I usually HATE the day. So much so that I wouldn’t get up on mother’s day. At all. I won’t go out of the house. I won’t go to church, ESP not to church. All the little ones handing out little gifts would make me sick to my stomach. I would just pretend the day never existed. Pigging out in front of the television watching anything but soppy movies.

 

So for the first time this year, I am a mom. I don’t have to pretend it doesn’t hurt. I don’t have to see the eyes of those who realize the pain and them trying to ‘make it better’. I am actually looking forward to Mother’s DAY!! I know it’s only through Grace and we are really really blessed to be able to say we are parents.

It’s difficult to explain the feeling to anybody that has not been in our situation. Somebody that never had to get the ‘ai shame’ look every time they would have something about moms and all your friends gets to enjoy something and you have to sit, watching their handbags. And people act differently. Some would pretend to not notice (we like those). Some would give you the ‘oh my heart is breaking for you’ look (we appreciate those, but don’t want them in public where you might burst out in tears). And some are just totally oblivious to your feelings and come show off their gifts (some days we like those, some days we hate them – depending on the hormone treatment you are on)…

So although I’m going to have a heart full of joy this year, I ask you to spare a moment for those who aren’t moms yet. Those who long to be one. Those who have babies in heaven that can’t give them a gift. And whatever your situation is,just realize that although they pretend to not care, they really do…

 

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2 thoughts on “My first Mother’s day!

  1. Ek kon dit myself nie beter gestel het nie. Geniet jou 1ste, ek gun dit vir enige jou en enige iemand anders wat daarna gehunker het. Ek en ander sal nog verder bly droom.

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