Falling in love is hard on the knees

On Saturday we went to a local charity shop and due to Trixi’s fear of heights, she stayed at the bottom level while I took Sky to look around the books, puzzles and toys on the upper level.

Coming down the metal stairs, my foot gave way under me and I had a nasty fall – with Sky in my arms.

Superdaddy instincts kicked in and I cradled her in my arms making sure I took the full impact of the fall, and although she screamed and cried from the shock of falling, physically she was fine.

I on the other hand (or foot) have a leg which is badly scraped and a foot which is turning different shades of purple.

But at least I know without a doubt, even though she is not my biological child, I would sacrifice my own wellbeing to make sure no harm comes to my beautiful daughter.

Trixi’s supermommy instincts also kicked in – she rushed from the other side of the shop to our aid the second she heard the thump – it could have been any customer, but she instinctively knew it was Sky and myself.

PS my apologies to Aerosmith for “borrowing” their song title for this blog post.


Museums and memories

On Saturday we took Sky to the museum at Bayworld here in Port Elizabeth. You may ask how much can a four-month-old take in about a museum.

I think quite a lot.

Having grown up in the Gauteng region, I still have memories of my earliest visits to the Museum of Natural History in Pretoria, even of exhibits that closed before I was two-years-old. I also remember loving exploring Santarama Miniland (which I read on the internet is in desperate need of renovation).

Taking Sky around Bayworld, she enjoyed the dinosaurs (just like her daddy used to), and also was very interested in their collection of shells, seaweed and water creatures. (She may have thought she was watching an episode of SpongeBob SquarePants!)

But once we got to the upstairs area where the cultural history is, she fell asleep (hmmmm, not likely to share daddy’s interest in antiques and political history!)

Overall it was a great outing though, and I can’t wait to take her on other outings as she grows up!


Get this party started

One thing that has definitely changed since we adopted Sky is that we don’t go out as much. By the evening we’re both tired, it’s her bedtime and we just slump down in front of the TV or with a book. 

Yesterday Sky got her first party invitation, an invite to a friend’s baby’s first birthday. That’s when it struck us. 

Our baby has a better social life than we do! 

Party on, Sky! 


Is there a doctor in the house?

It’s funny how when you’re a parent things which you never showed the slightest interest in before can fill your heart with joy.

Today the social worker mailed us a document from the magistrate’s court giving us the go-ahead to add Sky to our medical aid although she’s still not officially adopted yet.

Overall Sky is a very healthy baby, we don’t really have any problems with her. But her tummy is still not working quite as it should. We often go a worrying number of days between dirty nappies and can see she’s in pain when she’s trying to make one. So to know that if we do go to see a doctor that she will fall under our medical aid is one of those little victories that brings a smile to a dad’s face.

To fill everyone in on other developments, Sky is growing incredibly quickly – almost up to 9kg now, even though she is only four months old.

We took her in to meet my colleagues last week and had a great belated baby shower for her.

She’s started going to a day mother once a week just to get used to being around other children and to give Mommy a much-needed break, and Sky is adjusting very well, no problems at all so far.

And our cats have really taken on the roles as big brother and sister, always looking out for her and wanted to cuddle with her.


Separation anxiety

It seems like ever since Sky came home with us I’ve had to work one extra-long day after the other. This means that often by the time I get home she’s already asleep and if like today I’ve had to do some work from home before going to the office, I haven’t really spent much time with her before work either.

I’m sure every parent goes through this, but I’m really feeling so torn. I need to work to get the money we need to pay for things (like formula, nappies etc etc).

But I really want to spend more time with her.



What you talkin’ ’bout Willis?

It’s strange that while the SABC was used as a propaganda tool in the 1980s to try to perpetuate the apartheid doctrine, two popular American programmes which the broadcaster had no problem in showing were Diff’rent Strokes and Webster.

Both involved white families adopting black children.

Diff’rent Strokes ran in the US from 1978 to 1985 (I think in SA we still had it on screen into the early ’90s) and told the story of a white man who adopted his deceased employee’s children Arnold and Willis who became brothers to his biological daughter, Kimberley.

Webster ran from 1983 to 1987 and also featured a black child whose biological parents had died and was adopted by his white godparents.

Maybe by showing these programmes the SABC was trying to prove that the only way black people could be uplifted was by being guided by white people, or some other weird racist ideology.

But for the children watching these shows three decades ago, it has led to a generation of South Africans who are more than happy to adopt children of another race.

If Trixi and I lived in a bubble, I don’t think we’d ever think of Sky as black – she’s our daughter, end of story. But we are aware of the realities of other people’s prejudices and will do everything in our power to make her prepared for when she has to face the outside world, but at the same time make her know that she is loved unconditionally at home and that she should not judge others based on race, culture, religion or circumstance.


Back at work

Unfortunately men only get three days of paternity leave, so I wasn’t able to spend nearly as long as I wanted to bonding with Sky.

I went back to work on Monday. Today is only Wednesday and it already feels like the longest working week ever. I just long to be home with her, talking to her, cuddling her, reading her stories, singing silly songs.

I’m determined the time I do have with her will be quality time. Today before going to work I made her a bottle and read her Dr Seuss’s If I Ran the Zoo, full of all it’s nonsense rhymes and made-up creatures. She really seemed to enjoy it – regardless of whether it made any sense to her.

I know it’s important for me to be at work, so we can earn the money for all the nappies, bottles and other necessities, and to start saving for her future school fees.

But I still wish I could spend everyday with her. Oh well, we’re halfway through the week. Weekend’s almost here.